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Studies on How To Be Happy
How to be happy has been the main focus of my studies for the last six or seven years. That is because I went through a period in life where I was not very happy. (See About Me and Codependency and Joy In My Posterity) Feelings such as sadness, anxiety or depression are part of life and have a purpose. However, the majority of my emotions at that time were negative with occasional bursts of happiness. It should be the other way around. After a while I learned where I was going wrong. I saw why what had worked for me since childhood wasn’t serving me anymore. This post is my own thoughts on happiness, but they are consistent (at least in part) with popular and classic experts in a variety of fields.
Some of these professionals are: Abraham Maslow (Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs); neurologist and psychologist Victor Frankle (Man’s Search for Meaning); psychiatrist, researcher, author Daniel Amen (Change Your Brain, Change Your Life); researcher Brene Brown (Daring Greatly); the “father of modern mindfulness” John Kabat-Zinn; parenting experts Jim Fay, Charles Fay and Foster Cline (Love and Logic), behavioral scientist Paul Dolan, philosopher Codependence expert and author Melody Beatte (Codependent No More), Family Therapist Douglas Dobberfuhl M.S. (Healing the Codependent Heart), motivational speaker and minister Norman Vincent Peale (The Power of Positive Thinking), Roko Belic’s popular Netflix Documentary “Happy”, and, most importantly, the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ found in the scriptures.
I believe all of these professionals (with the exception of the Lord) have part of the answer on how to be happy, but are missing important components to the bigger picture.
Rat Park
This series of articles was prompted because recently my husband told me about an interesting study on drug addiction with rats. Isolated rats in cages were given a water bottle with morphine and a water bottle without. The isolated rats consistently drank from the drugged water.
Another group of rats were also offered morphine water and plain water, but these rats lived together in “Rat Park”. Bruce K. Alexander,Professor Emeritus, Simon Fraser University described rat park as “a great big plywood box on the floor of our laboratory, fill[ed] with things that rats like, such as platforms for climbing, tin cans for hiding in, wood chips for strewing around, and running wheels for exercise.” He continues, “ Naturally we included lots of rats of both sexes, and naturally the place soon was teeming with babies.” The rats in “Rat Park” tried the drugged water, but consistently drank plain water instead. He has written about the study in The Globalisation of Addiction: A study in poverty of the spirit, Oxford University Press, 2008.
My Rat Park
His study got me thinking, “What would my “Rat Park” be like?” What does my family need so we won’t feel drawn to drugs or other harmful behaviors such as compulsive shopping, gambling, overeating, social media, video games and screen time? Even positive things can be done compulsively: religion, cleaning, socializing, etc. So, do I need to fill my environment with the human equivalent of platforms, tin cans, woodchips, and running wheels? Maybe I need to have a nicer house? Maybe I need more vacations and entertainment?
These thoughts reminded me of my blog “How to Be Happy When You are Poor“. I compared my ideas in that post to Professor Alexander’s findings. Bruce R. Alexander concluded that people need “a viable social and cultural life with purpose, adventure/stimulation, attachment, identity, and belonging“. As I pondered his study I organized my thoughts about where true happiness comes from. I agree with him, but would like to add to the answer he gives.
My Philosophy on How To Be Happy
The key to happiness (and dealing with all the challenges of life) is to fill our lives with the love and the light of Christ by loving God, ourselves, and others. As we do these things we will have a viable social and cultural life with purpose, adventure/stimulation, attachment, identity, belonging, and much more.
WHAT IF A PERSON IS NOT RELIGIOUS?
Does this mean that people who do not believe in God (and specifically Jesus Christ) cannot be happy? No, there are obviously many people around the world that are happy who are not Christians or even religious.
THE LIGHT OF CHRIST
Everything good and of God is full of the light of Christ. To the degree that people live according to good and just principles they bring the light of Christ into their lives, even if they do not know where it is coming from. “The Light of Christ is the divine energy, power, or influence that proceeds from God through Christ and gives life and light to all things.” (“Light of Christ“) Even if they do not realize it, people connect with God through nature and loving his creations. The light of Christ encompasses knowledge, intelligence, love and every other positive, godly attribute. It is also the source of what we call our “conscience” and is different from the Holy Ghost.
what love is
Think of love as unity, nurturing, and connection. The highest, noblest and strongest kind of love is charity. “Charity is the pure love of Christ. It is the love that Christ has for the children of men and that the children of men should have for one another. ” Charity is “the most joyous to the soul” (see 1 Nephi 11:23).”
Series on How To Be Happy
So, our social and cultural life, purpose, adventure/stimulation, attachment, identity, belonging, and light of Christ are all found in loving God, ourselves and others. Let’s look closer at this theory. Over the next few weeks I will post 4 more blogs. They will not be a complete explanation on how to do these things. Past and future blog posts address how to love and overcome obstacles to love in more detail. Here’s what’s coming.
- How to Be Happy – Part 1
- Love God – Part 2 of How To Be Happy
- Love Yourself – Part 3 of How To Be Happy
- Love Others- Part 4 of How To Be Happy
- Overcome Love Road-Blocks- Part 5 of How To Be Happy
Until Next Time… Keep Smiling. 🙂
Thank you very much! I appreciate that.